Tuesday, August 26, 2008

A Roll of the Dice

On Friday of last week, Seaman came by the house to get the extra key. He is going to rent my third bedroom for a while so he can get away from his parents' house. (I don't blame him - I'm much more fun than his parents!!) So we sat in my kitchen and visited for a while and figured out that we were going to be enjoying some happy hour beverages at the same location later in the evening.

Flash forward to happy hour - which was more like a high school reunion, but enjoyable none the less. Seaman invites Rocket Scientist Barbie*, and Mustang* tries to have a conversation with her. Unfortunately, she isn't very friendly. Nor is she very smart. Mustang was not impressed. I left soon after she arrived so, sadly, I have no stories to share.

I assumed that Seaman was going to move in on Saturday, and when he didn't I figured he would do it on Sunday. Wrong again. However, yesterday, he decided, was the day to begin his transfer of things to my house.
So he arrives around 4 with nothing in his hands. We chat for a while as I finish my packing spreadsheet (don't laugh) for California. Then his phone rings. He mutters something about crazy girls and walks out the door. While he is outside my mom calls me and we are in the middle of a conversation when he returns with a duffel bag. After putting it in his room he goes back outside. I assume that he is going to get another load of things. I was wrong. He comes back in with Rocket Scientist Barbie behind him, both of them carrying cups from Sonic. I am still on the phone with my mom when I hear bags rustling and cupboards opening. Wanting him to feel at home, I just go on with my conversation. After I hang up the phone, RSB asks if I want some cottage cheese and pineapple. WHAT?? I politely decline, but join them in the kitchen. (Sometimes I try to be friendly - it doesn't happen often, but I do make an effort every now and again.)

So we're sitting in the kitchen at the bar and I'm writing myself a note when Seaman asks, "Do you want to go to the gym tonight?" I assume he's talking to his female companion and don't answer. After 45 seconds of silence, I look up and ask, "Were you talking to me?" RSB informs me that she doesn't go to the gym, so that leaves only me. We discuss the gym plans for a couple of minutes while she finishes up her after-school snack. I then commence packing and the two of them head for Seaman's room and close the door.

I'll take the time right now to let you know that the only things in that room are a bed, a trash can, and now a duffel bag. I continue to pack and every once in a while I hear her giggle. I wanted to go ahead and tell her that Seaman isn't that funny, but I let it slide.
I go back into the kitchen and realize that her purse is still sitting on the counter. My first thought is, This girl doesn't even know me - it probably isn't smart to leave her purse sitting on my counter. That thought is quickly erased when I realize that this isn't any ordinary purse we are dealing with. This is a metallic purple, Apple Bottom purse. (Apparently this purse was last year's style because I couldn't find it on the website. However, imagine the purse below in a metallic dark purple - with a more bowling ball bag style - got it? Good.)

But wait, it gets better. I had to drop some stuff off at my mom's house before I left for California, so I decided that now would be the time to do it. I open the garage, pull out in my very stylish car, and almost run into the neighbors' house because I'm laughing so hard. Not only does this girl carry a metallic purple, Apple Bottom purse - she drives a car the color of the purse pictured above, with hot pink polka dot fuzzy dice in the mirror. Are you kidding me??? I can not make this shit up!

As a random side note: I landed in Sacramento today for my never-ending tour of Cali and I found myself looking around for my Swisher-Sweet-smoking-boyfriend. I didn't find him. Sad.


  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

  2. (there was a spelling error in y last post, so reposting):

    shorty got those APPLE BOTTOM jeans.... boots with the furrrr!! And... Vegas called - they want their dice back.

  3. son of a! I missed an "m" in "my" - maybe only 1 more glass of wine.

  4. I was waiting for you to comment - thanks!!

  5. freaking he even there now?