Friday, June 15, 2012

OMG, Mommy

So, the other day BIL and one of his employees were setting up the playhouse/playground in Sissy's backyard when Tiny looked out the window and then proclaimed, "OMG, Mommy, they are building me a house!"

And in true Airplane and Match fashion, we can not let it go!

But let's stop hee-hawing around and get to the point of this post.

A very long time ago I was telling O'Dub about a couple of dates that I had been on and he replied, "Where do you keep finding these idiots who are going on dates with you"

I do believe that statement came out different than he meant for it to, and we're going to talk about some of those idiots right now.

Mostly because I want you all to feel sorry for me and think about all of the men you know. Now narrow it down to the single ones. Now the funny ones. Now the nice ones.

Now send them my contact information so they can buy me dinner.

I'm kidding.

A little.

Unless you have a nice, single, funny gentleman in the Phoenix Metro area - in which case - bring it on!

But, uh, back to the lecture at hand.
Perfection is perfected, so I'm 'a let 'em understand...

I went on a blind date recently.

No, really - he was blind.

In his right eye (it was actually glass). And partially blind in his left.

And he kept telling me how beautiful I was (and you can save the jokes, I've already made them all at my own expense.)

And he said he was an Air Traffic Controller.

But really, he worked in the reservations department for an airline.

Slight difference.

Semantics, really.

And at the end of the date he asked me for my number. And in my inability to say no, I gave it to him.

And he texted me less than 15 minutes after he left me at the stairs to the parking garage.


Seriously, I didn't even have to answer, he just kept texting and texting and texting.

He finally stopped a couple of weeks ago.

I really do hope he met someone else.

I recently had drinks and dinner with a friend and his girlfriend. I won't lie to you, the fact that he had a girlfriend to bring to drinks and dinner came as a bit of surprise to me.

And the whole event was a little awkward. I tried to make conversation with her, but she wasn't much for that. And he spent the majority of the evening telling her how awesome I am and all of the reasons that he loves me.


Seriously, I think I started to blush at one point. I mean, I like to hear nice things about me, but he was taking it to the extreme.

And while he was talking, she would look at me.

Super strange sitch!

And then - to just really throw the whole thing into the WTF-is-happening-in-my-life category - he texted me at an unreasonable hour to say thanks, that I have a good energy, and that they enjoyed my company.

Oh, and that he and I should go golfing soon.


Seriously, can someone tell me where the normal AND single guys hang out?

Because OMG, Mommy, this is out of control.

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