I'm A Hero!

On Wednesday, we had a blood drive at work. 

I found the hero in me and donated.

It's not really my favorite thing to do, but I do it anyway. Because people need it.

And it is a small price.

The next day I was talking to my coworker whose son came down to donate blood with her.

We were talking about the pre-donation questioning, and I was telling her how I get so nervous because they are talking so fast.

And they are asking questions like, Since 1986 have you had sex with a man, whose had sex with a man, whose had sex with a monkey for drugs.

Clearly, the answer to that is no.

But they talk so fast and I'm so scared to answer incorrectly that I end up just sitting there.

And then I get nervous that the girl is judging me because when I pause to answer she thinks that there is a chance that the answer is yes.

(I do realize that I'm a crazy person.)

So, then my coworker says to me, "Well, at least I know now that my son has never had sex with a man."

Cheater, Cheater

I was over on Lauren's blog and she filled out this silly internet questionairre and I keep getting complaints because I'm not blogging enough so here is a cheat post for you.

Buckle in, this is a long one!

1. What is your best friend's Mom's name? I'm not really prepared to share this information with you. I've heard about those stalkers on the internet...

2. Where is the weirdest place you have a mole?  I have A LOT of moles! Like, a lot! I'm not sure any are in a weird place, but there is one right under where my bra sits on the left side of my chest and it is super annoying. And I have gone to no less than three dermatologists to get it removed and no one will take it off me. What's with that? 

3. Who was the hottest teacher you ever had?  Mr. Ermisch (I just had to go get out my 7th grade yearbook to double check the spelling of his name - what a riot that experience was!) Either way, Mr. Ermisch was never actually my teacher, he taught 8th Grade Social Studies when I was in 7th Grade, and then left the school at the end of that year and was replaced by my cousin. So while I was deprived the ability to stare at Mr. Ermisch's beautiful mullet, I got to watch Little Giants like 100 times instead of learning about whatever it is you are supposed to learn about in 8th grade Social Studies.

5. What body part do you wash first?  Depends on the day. If I just get home from CrossFit, I have to wash the chalk and gym nasty off of my hands. Otherwise, it's always my face.

6. Do you hover over the toilet in public bathrooms? I'd like to tell you that I always did, but then I saw the MythBusters epi where they proved that more germs are on the toilet handle than the actual seat, but that wouldn't be true. Because I have never hovered over toilets in public restrooms. The last place that I'm worried about germs is on my butt.


However, a couple of years ago I was working on a Congressional campaign and our office only had unisex restrooms, which made me realize how annoying it is when a dude leaves the toilet seat up. Because really, it is disgusting that I have to touch the seat to put it back down. Then I got to thinking, it is pretty gross that dudes have to touch the seat to lift it up. So really, we should all quit bitching and invent a toilet seat with a motor to lift it up and down.

7. What's the strangest talent you have? I don't really think I have any strange talents. 

8. Do you have an innie or an outtie? Innies Rule! I mean really, an outtie? So weird.

9. What's your favorite flavored Pringles? The truth is, I very rarely eat Pringles because once you pop you can't stop. And I need to stop. Trust me.


However, in the recent past Sissy did have a can of dill pickle pringles that were pretty freaking tasty!

10. Have you ever been tied up? My parents read this blog, I plead the Fifth.


Just kidding, I have never been tied up. But if Christian Grey happens to saunter by with some natural filament rope, I could maybe be persuaded.

11. What was the last thing you ever got grounded for? I honestly can not remember. But my favorite story is still this one. 


12. Do you parallel park or drive around the block? It depends on the sitch. I really don't like to parallel park, but I will do it on occasion.


Funny story: when I first graduated college and was working for the Home Builders Assoc., I would frequently have to go down to Phoenix City Hall to file and/or pick up paperwork and the parking down there is a monster! So I would drive around for about five minutes and then when I would finally give up and try to parallel park, the homeless guys would help direct me into the spots. Seriously, I was bad. I would usually give them a dollar for their time. I believe in rewarding good service.

13. Have you ever had two dates in one night?  Unless you count the time that I was angry at a guy I was dating because he cancelled our date the night before (because he was in the hospital - no I'm not kidding, this is why I'm trying to move away from dating older men) so when he asked me to go out with him the next night I forced him to wait until after I had dinner with some girlfriends. So he bought tickets to the late comedy show and I totally showed up late at his house and we had to rush to make it to the venue on time. 

14. How many times have you been cussed out? To my face? I can't think of one. Behind my back? Probably a.lot!

15. Which shoe do you put on first? If I'm putting on flips or heels, probably whichever one is turned in the right direction. Tennis shoes or boots? I think I tend to put the right one on first. 

17. Have you ever been to a gay bar?  I have. When I was in college I went to visit a gay friend who lived in Vegas and he took me to a gay bar in a very shady part of town. (Yes, shady even for Vegas.) And it was like underwear night or some such business. And I was a little upset that there were so many good looking men in one place and none of them liked girls.


Also, one time BodyBuilder and I were in Tucson for Spring Training and we somehow ended up downtown in a club that I'm not completely sure wasn't a gay club. Super strange experience.

OMG - and I just remembered that BodyBuilder's gay friend who was with us took off his shoes and started doing gymnastics on the dance floor and got reprimanded for taking off his shoes. Not for flailing around and almost hitting numerous people.

18. Girls  are very dramatic. (I'm just assuming this was a fill-in-the-blank question.) 

19. Is there one thing all of your love interests have had in common? If you ask Sissy she'll tell you it's that they were gay. But that's not really true. It only happened once. That I know of. 

20. Did you French kiss before you were 16? I did. I know, I'm such a floozie! 

21. Have you ever been cow-tipping or snipe-hunting?  No. We got our kicks toilet papering people's houses. Such rebels.


Big T was our favorite target - one time we toilet papered his house in blue and yellow TP (our school colors) when he was on vacation. And when we were running across the street back to the LTZ get-away car, Sissy tripped and slid all the way across the dirt road.

And after our sophomore year of high school he moved to another school so we went to TP his house the night before school started, I was the get-away driver because I was in a hip-to-ankle brace after having knee surgery; and one of the idiot boys that was with us set off fireworks after they had thrown the TP everywhere and nearly sent the whole thing up in flames.

22. Who is the last person you usually think about before you fall asleep? Lately it has been DVL. He called me a diagonal-sleeping bed hog last week and I'm convinced it is because I sleep in a GIANT bed alone, so each night when I lay down to go to sleep I make a conscious effort to only sleep in my spot. I'm trying to see if I can train my brain to change. 


See, I can put others needs ahead of my own.

23. Have you ever had a poem or a song written about you? In my mind Gary Allan wrote She Gets Me about me. 


That counts, right?

24. If you had to choose to not ever wash your bed sheets again or not wash your bath towel ever again, which would you rather not wash?  What kind of sicko wrote this question?

25. Have you ever found anything in your parents' bedroom that was questionable? I really try not to search my parents' bedroom. It's kind of like when people say, "don't ask questions you don't want the answer to." You know?

26. What was your childhood nickname? Wowie. (Pronounced like whoa-wee). Which has evolved into Weestie - via Woweesta and Weesta. Also, my uncle still calls me RDV (abbreviation for Raquel de la Verdura). And my parents' good friend calls me Rae - he is the only person who has ever called me that and the only person that I will answer to that name.


I am named after my dad's sister, PieRanch, who is named after her aunt. When my great aunt was a child, for some reason I do not know, they called her "Pete" so when my aunt was born they started called her "Petie." At one point my grandmother joked that they should call me "Repeat." Thank the TTBJ that didn't stick!

27. When is the last time you played the air guitar? Saturday night at our family reunion. We danced the night away, which very frequently includes a little air guitar.

28. Have you ever peeked in the opposite sexes locker room? Peeked? (Dad, close your eyes.)


I do believe I just walked right in. Oops.


(Ok, Dad, you can open them now.)

29. What's the weirdest thing you have done while driving?  Again, when I worked for the Home Builders, I used to attend "jumpin' gym" in the city where I now work; and in order to get to my appointment in time to get a full hour in before they closed, I didn't have a lot of time to change my clothes. So...I would get dressed while driving. It was a very intricate process that included some serious strategy.

30. Have you ever bitten your toenails? Umm, no. That is disgusting!

31. How do you eat your cookie? I really try to stay away from cookies. You know, gluten intolerance and all. And like Diddy says, "that's not good for you. Turns you into a raving bitch." It's a good thing I'm a salty/savory kind of girl. 

32. When working out at the gym, do you wear a belt? Only when I wear this outfit:

And when my suspenders are dirty. Obvi.

33. Name something you do when you're alone that you wouldn't do in front of others. Wear the outfit in the picture above.


36. How many drinks does it take before you get drunk? I'm not exactly sure, but it always seems like it is just one from "I'm fine" to "WOO! Blowin' it all out!"


37. Have you ever sniffed an animal's butt? No, but I have artificially inseminated a mare so I've had my hand up one.


38. How often do you clean out your ears? Every other day or so.


39. Do you scrunch or fold your toilet paper? Scrunch.


40. About how many times a day do you pick a wedgie?  Very few.


41. Do you have any strange phobias? I don't think so.


42. Have you ever stuck a foreign object up your nose? No. But once when I was really little, Sissy and I were defying our parents and refusing to go to sleep once we were put to bed and somehow I swallowed a penny. And I FREAKED out! I'm not kidding you - I was hysterical. And I remember Papa carrying me into the kitchen and getting me a drink of water and reassuring me that the penny would not kill me. That was probably traumatizing enough to keep things out of my nose.


43. What is the stupidest thing you've ever done at a bar? A shot.
 
44. Have you ever been dared to do something you totally regretted?  I'm not certain, but I typically was a "truth" picker.

45. Have you ever called your love interest by an ex's name? No.

46. Have you caught a guy/girl farting while on a date? Can't say that I have.

47. Have you ever played naked Twister? Definitely not.  

48. Have you ever been drunk at work? Not intentionally, but there were probably a few times during my internship in Denver when I hadn't fully recovered from the night before.

49. Have you ever found your date's/lover's brother or sister more attractive? Nope.

50. Do you want to bring sexy back? I'm sorry - do you know me? Done and done!

Miscellaneous Me

one

are you sure

I have discovered something that makes me crazy! It may be totally irrational, but isn't that how I roll anyway?

If I ask you if you would like me to do something and you reply, "sure," I'm certain to go nuts!

I don't know why, but it just seems so non-committal to me and I can't stand it.

two

weather

We spent the weekend in southern Arizona for a family reunion this weekend.

I love the monsoon in that part of the country. Nothing compares to an afternoon rainstorm down there!

three

sleeping like a baby

Whoever started using that term to mean that they had a great night sleep should be punched in the wiener!

At the family reunion, I shared a room with Sissy, BIL, and SisterSmalls.

SisterSmalls doesn't sleep through the night.

Reassuring me that I'm not sure I'd like to have children of my own.

It's a good thing she is cute!

three

tool time

I got a tool to help me with my calluses from CrossFit.

This baby is a little dangerous, but it seems to have shaved my calluses down.

We'll see if it helps.

four

little sister

On Friday I will fly to Boise to pick up Sissy's new car and drive it home.

Fourteen hours in the car by myself.

Wish me luck.

And remind her of this when it comes to buy me gifts, please.

Spontaneity

So I got all crazy out of my comfort zone last weekend and did something without any plan at all.

And it wasn't just like, drove down the street.

I freaking packed up my car on Friday morning around 8 am and drove to Carson, CA to be a spectator at the CrossFit Games.

Now if you know anything about me (I should have included this in my list of 15 on Monday...), you know that I do not do things spontaneously.

However, I had spent a majority of Wednesday following the Camp Pendleton event via CrossFit Radio and Twitter, then on Thursday I watched Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter as my team arrived and got checked in, etc. And I was sad.

I wanted to be there. So I texted my friend who was there. And she said, "Just come."

On Friday morning, she called me. She said just get in your car and come, I have an extra ticket. 

So I called Match and asked her if I was crazy for going.

She said that I wasn't, but she did say that I was probably either going to enjoy it so much that I would start being spontaneous all of the time. Or I would spontaneously combust.

I can tell you, without any doubt at all, that I do not regret my decision.

It was seriously one of the most amazing experiences of my life. It motivated me to be a better CrossFitter. To eat cleaner. To really dedicate myself to my fitness journey.

It is hard to imagine my body ever being able to do some of the things that the competitors did over that weekend. And the truth of the matter is, it may never do some of them. But I'll never know if I don't try.

Also, it was the highest concentration of good looking men that I've ever been around in my life. That doesn't hurt one bit.

If you want to read more about the CrossFit Games, you can do so at CrossFit.com.

If you would like to read more about my team's experience, you can do that here.

What you see in the picture above is the women of some of the teams completing 20 rope climbs after completing 30 clean and jerks with 135 lbs.

This picture was the stadium before Friday afternoon's chipper workout. The stadium soon filled up.

Getting to Know Me Miscellany

I was really planning to go a different direction with this post today, but I read Cheyenne's blog before I posted and she inspired me to share some things about myself - for those of you who don't know me.

Funny story about this picture - I am typically against wearing headbands like this, but we went to the Miranda Lambert concert on July 3 and SuperFan had me wearing this like a real headband. Well, turns out my head is too big for it and it kept doing weird things so I took it off and was messing around when I put it on this way. Then Dirty had someone take a picture of us. Then of course I instagrammed it. And then my family freaked out! And said it was the best picture they have ever seen of me. 

They are a little crazy.

But let's talk about me some more... :)

1. When I was a kid, we were farm laborers for the summer. We started by chopping cotton, then moved up to the sprayer tractor - they actually rigged up a tractor that Sissy, YogaHippy, and I could all work on. They welded two seats to the front, so one person would drive and two would spray. (And we would change to words to songs to fit our lives - there were some funny moments out there in those fields.)

2. For the first time in my life, I think I may be addicted to something. Fitness. It sounds so cliche to say it, but I really do feel like CrossFit changed my life. And now I want everyone around me to be fit and active.

3. I toy with the idea of going back to school. I haven't pulled the trigger, but I get closer every day.

4. I love my nephews and niece more than anything, but I'm no longer sure that I want to have children of my own.

5. I wish I could hip-hop dance. I'm not saying I would like to be a back up dancer in any music videos, but when I watch So You Think You Can Dance, I am always the most in awe of the hip hop dancers.

6. I want to make a difference in the world.

7. Sometimes I want to move to a new city and try something totally different.

8. I really like to entertain people. When people get joy out of their interactions with me - it makes my day!

9. I am crazy independent (like don't-like-to-ask-for-help-independent). I think sometimes it is one of my biggest flaws.

10. I was recently reminded how much I love the smell of Zest soap. I think it is nostalgia, but man, I love that smell!

11. I love to cook! Seriously, if I could afford it, I would spend the weekends trying new recipes and feeding people. I could go broke buying the ingredients for all of the food I want to make.

12. My sisters and brother know all of the ways to make me crazy (and they practice frequently), but if someone moves even remotely in the direction of messing with them, I become a crazy protective mad woman! For real - you don't want to try it.

13. Despite my tough exterior, I am super sensitive. Just because you don't see me cry, doesn't mean it doesn't happen.

14. Wow - it is really hard to think of 15 things about myself that seem even remotely meaningful.

15. Music moves my soul. There are times when I am listening to my iPod and a song comes on that just speaks to where I am in that exact moment, and I will play it on repeat just to soak it all in. (Typically while rocking out - I'm sure I provide much entertainment for the other drivers on the road.)

Now head on over to Carissa's blog and read something new.

Scorpion Queen

OMG!!!

Yesterday I had a kind of important lunch for work, so I wore a black dress with ruffles on the top and brought a white jacket to wear over it to the lunch.

Lunch went well and when I got back to the car I took the white jacket off so as not to have a heat stroke.

I went straight to a coffee meeting from lunch, where I was stood up. So I ordered an iced coffee and headed back to the office.

I got in the elevator at the office and looked in the mirror.

Luckily I was alone in the elevator because I noticed that there was something on my dress under the ruffle and thought to myself, Oh no, I hope that there wasn't something on my dress all during lunch.

Then I realized that it was a scorpion!

I am not kidding you - I freaked out! I started screaming and trying to get it off me. I broke my badge and it fell to the floor. Then I temporarily lost the scorpion.

When I found it, it was trying to crawl away on the floor of the elevator, but I killed it!

There are a variety of theories as to where the scorpion came from:

Match thinks that it had been in the jacket.

Big T thinks that it crawled up a wall or a tree and fell on me.

Either way, I am getting tired of the scorpions. I don't like them!

I don't like them at all.

And now I feel like things are crawling on me all of the time.

Yuck!

Excuuuse me, Officer...

A long, long time ago H&M used to coordinate having the whole family go to the Wigwam for the Fourth of July.

We would basically take over the pool for the weekend and scare off the other families and enjoy ourselves. 

This year, now that my generation is having children, I coordinated a trip back to the place where it all began. 

We arrived around lunchtime on Friday and got right to the business of swimming.

In the past couple of years, the Wigwam has switched owners and they remodeled the pool, adding two very large water slides. These slides have a height requirement of 48" to ride.

On Friday afternoon, Biggie and Match went up the slide and the lifeguard at the top let him go down without any problem even though Biggie was probably about two inches too short.

But each time he went down the slide (which was a lot on Friday), he had no trouble swimming away from the bottom to the side.

So, Saturday morning we all head back to the pool and Papa and Biggie head up the stairs to the slide. Different lifeguards today and they tell him that he is too little to go down the slide.

Papa is a little upset, but they decide to follow the rules and walk back down the stairs.


A couple of hours later, Papa notices a little girl who is shorter than Biggie going down the slide. So they head back up the stairs and go through the whole deal again.


The girl at the top tells him that the problem is that little kids can't swim. So he takes Biggie down the stairs and talks to the girl at the bottom saying that Biggie will take a swim test and show her that he is capable. That girl says that it isn't about the swimming.


In the meantime, Sissy gets involved and gives the Pool Nazi a little piece of her mind. Around this time, we are watching Papa from the pool and he starts pointing his finger sternly at the girl at the top of the slide. Then he takes Biggie and they walk down one level of stairs where he begins to point his finger and yell at the girl at the bottom of the slide.


Taking bets on what he is saying, Diddy's guess is that he's telling her, "Get Jerry Colangelo (the resort owner) on the phone! Do you know who I am?"


Which reminds of this clip from one of the greatest movies ever made. (PS - I hate it when youtube won't let me embed videos...)


Back to the story - about the time Papa gets to the bottom of the stairs, the Pool Nazi comes up to talk to him so I head over there to supervise.


Basically, she relays her conversation with Sissy to him, then agrees that they need to be consistent, and takes Biggie to the lifeguard at the bottom of slide and make him complete a swim test. Which he excelled at with Michael Phelps-like precision.


What can we say? They called down the Thunder - and they got it.


Oh, and in case you were wondering, what Papa said to those girls while pointing his finger was, "I'll be watching you. And if anyone even a fraction of an inch shorter than 48" goes down this slide. I will shut.it.down!"