Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Excuuuse me, Officer...

A long, long time ago H&M used to coordinate having the whole family go to the Wigwam for the Fourth of July.

We would basically take over the pool for the weekend and scare off the other families and enjoy ourselves. 

This year, now that my generation is having children, I coordinated a trip back to the place where it all began. 

We arrived around lunchtime on Friday and got right to the business of swimming.

In the past couple of years, the Wigwam has switched owners and they remodeled the pool, adding two very large water slides. These slides have a height requirement of 48" to ride.

On Friday afternoon, Biggie and Match went up the slide and the lifeguard at the top let him go down without any problem even though Biggie was probably about two inches too short.

But each time he went down the slide (which was a lot on Friday), he had no trouble swimming away from the bottom to the side.

So, Saturday morning we all head back to the pool and Papa and Biggie head up the stairs to the slide. Different lifeguards today and they tell him that he is too little to go down the slide.

Papa is a little upset, but they decide to follow the rules and walk back down the stairs.

A couple of hours later, Papa notices a little girl who is shorter than Biggie going down the slide. So they head back up the stairs and go through the whole deal again.

The girl at the top tells him that the problem is that little kids can't swim. So he takes Biggie down the stairs and talks to the girl at the bottom saying that Biggie will take a swim test and show her that he is capable. That girl says that it isn't about the swimming.

In the meantime, Sissy gets involved and gives the Pool Nazi a little piece of her mind. Around this time, we are watching Papa from the pool and he starts pointing his finger sternly at the girl at the top of the slide. Then he takes Biggie and they walk down one level of stairs where he begins to point his finger and yell at the girl at the bottom of the slide.

Taking bets on what he is saying, Diddy's guess is that he's telling her, "Get Jerry Colangelo (the resort owner) on the phone! Do you know who I am?"

Which reminds of this clip from one of the greatest movies ever made. (PS - I hate it when youtube won't let me embed videos...)

Back to the story - about the time Papa gets to the bottom of the stairs, the Pool Nazi comes up to talk to him so I head over there to supervise.

Basically, she relays her conversation with Sissy to him, then agrees that they need to be consistent, and takes Biggie to the lifeguard at the bottom of slide and make him complete a swim test. Which he excelled at with Michael Phelps-like precision.

What can we say? They called down the Thunder - and they got it.

Oh, and in case you were wondering, what Papa said to those girls while pointing his finger was, "I'll be watching you. And if anyone even a fraction of an inch shorter than 48" goes down this slide. I will!"

No comments:

Post a Comment