Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Cheater, Cheater

I was over on Lauren's blog and she filled out this silly internet questionairre and I keep getting complaints because I'm not blogging enough so here is a cheat post for you.

Buckle in, this is a long one!

1. What is your best friend's Mom's name? I'm not really prepared to share this information with you. I've heard about those stalkers on the internet...

2. Where is the weirdest place you have a mole?  I have A LOT of moles! Like, a lot! I'm not sure any are in a weird place, but there is one right under where my bra sits on the left side of my chest and it is super annoying. And I have gone to no less than three dermatologists to get it removed and no one will take it off me. What's with that? 

3. Who was the hottest teacher you ever had?  Mr. Ermisch (I just had to go get out my 7th grade yearbook to double check the spelling of his name - what a riot that experience was!) Either way, Mr. Ermisch was never actually my teacher, he taught 8th Grade Social Studies when I was in 7th Grade, and then left the school at the end of that year and was replaced by my cousin. So while I was deprived the ability to stare at Mr. Ermisch's beautiful mullet, I got to watch Little Giants like 100 times instead of learning about whatever it is you are supposed to learn about in 8th grade Social Studies.

5. What body part do you wash first?  Depends on the day. If I just get home from CrossFit, I have to wash the chalk and gym nasty off of my hands. Otherwise, it's always my face.

6. Do you hover over the toilet in public bathrooms? I'd like to tell you that I always did, but then I saw the MythBusters epi where they proved that more germs are on the toilet handle than the actual seat, but that wouldn't be true. Because I have never hovered over toilets in public restrooms. The last place that I'm worried about germs is on my butt.

However, a couple of years ago I was working on a Congressional campaign and our office only had unisex restrooms, which made me realize how annoying it is when a dude leaves the toilet seat up. Because really, it is disgusting that I have to touch the seat to put it back down. Then I got to thinking, it is pretty gross that dudes have to touch the seat to lift it up. So really, we should all quit bitching and invent a toilet seat with a motor to lift it up and down.

7. What's the strangest talent you have? I don't really think I have any strange talents. 

8. Do you have an innie or an outtie? Innies Rule! I mean really, an outtie? So weird.

9. What's your favorite flavored Pringles? The truth is, I very rarely eat Pringles because once you pop you can't stop. And I need to stop. Trust me.

However, in the recent past Sissy did have a can of dill pickle pringles that were pretty freaking tasty!

10. Have you ever been tied up? My parents read this blog, I plead the Fifth.

Just kidding, I have never been tied up. But if Christian Grey happens to saunter by with some natural filament rope, I could maybe be persuaded.

11. What was the last thing you ever got grounded for? I honestly can not remember. But my favorite story is still this one. 

12. Do you parallel park or drive around the block? It depends on the sitch. I really don't like to parallel park, but I will do it on occasion.

Funny story: when I first graduated college and was working for the Home Builders Assoc., I would frequently have to go down to Phoenix City Hall to file and/or pick up paperwork and the parking down there is a monster! So I would drive around for about five minutes and then when I would finally give up and try to parallel park, the homeless guys would help direct me into the spots. Seriously, I was bad. I would usually give them a dollar for their time. I believe in rewarding good service.

13. Have you ever had two dates in one night?  Unless you count the time that I was angry at a guy I was dating because he cancelled our date the night before (because he was in the hospital - no I'm not kidding, this is why I'm trying to move away from dating older men) so when he asked me to go out with him the next night I forced him to wait until after I had dinner with some girlfriends. So he bought tickets to the late comedy show and I totally showed up late at his house and we had to rush to make it to the venue on time. 

14. How many times have you been cussed out? To my face? I can't think of one. Behind my back? Probably a.lot!

15. Which shoe do you put on first? If I'm putting on flips or heels, probably whichever one is turned in the right direction. Tennis shoes or boots? I think I tend to put the right one on first. 

17. Have you ever been to a gay bar?  I have. When I was in college I went to visit a gay friend who lived in Vegas and he took me to a gay bar in a very shady part of town. (Yes, shady even for Vegas.) And it was like underwear night or some such business. And I was a little upset that there were so many good looking men in one place and none of them liked girls.

Also, one time BodyBuilder and I were in Tucson for Spring Training and we somehow ended up downtown in a club that I'm not completely sure wasn't a gay club. Super strange experience.

OMG - and I just remembered that BodyBuilder's gay friend who was with us took off his shoes and started doing gymnastics on the dance floor and got reprimanded for taking off his shoes. Not for flailing around and almost hitting numerous people.

18. Girls  are very dramatic. (I'm just assuming this was a fill-in-the-blank question.) 

19. Is there one thing all of your love interests have had in common? If you ask Sissy she'll tell you it's that they were gay. But that's not really true. It only happened once. That I know of. 

20. Did you French kiss before you were 16? I did. I know, I'm such a floozie! 

21. Have you ever been cow-tipping or snipe-hunting?  No. We got our kicks toilet papering people's houses. Such rebels.

Big T was our favorite target - one time we toilet papered his house in blue and yellow TP (our school colors) when he was on vacation. And when we were running across the street back to the LTZ get-away car, Sissy tripped and slid all the way across the dirt road.

And after our sophomore year of high school he moved to another school so we went to TP his house the night before school started, I was the get-away driver because I was in a hip-to-ankle brace after having knee surgery; and one of the idiot boys that was with us set off fireworks after they had thrown the TP everywhere and nearly sent the whole thing up in flames.

22. Who is the last person you usually think about before you fall asleep? Lately it has been DVL. He called me a diagonal-sleeping bed hog last week and I'm convinced it is because I sleep in a GIANT bed alone, so each night when I lay down to go to sleep I make a conscious effort to only sleep in my spot. I'm trying to see if I can train my brain to change. 

See, I can put others needs ahead of my own.

23. Have you ever had a poem or a song written about you? In my mind Gary Allan wrote She Gets Me about me. 

That counts, right?

24. If you had to choose to not ever wash your bed sheets again or not wash your bath towel ever again, which would you rather not wash?  What kind of sicko wrote this question?

25. Have you ever found anything in your parents' bedroom that was questionable? I really try not to search my parents' bedroom. It's kind of like when people say, "don't ask questions you don't want the answer to." You know?

26. What was your childhood nickname? Wowie. (Pronounced like whoa-wee). Which has evolved into Weestie - via Woweesta and Weesta. Also, my uncle still calls me RDV (abbreviation for Raquel de la Verdura). And my parents' good friend calls me Rae - he is the only person who has ever called me that and the only person that I will answer to that name.

I am named after my dad's sister, PieRanch, who is named after her aunt. When my great aunt was a child, for some reason I do not know, they called her "Pete" so when my aunt was born they started called her "Petie." At one point my grandmother joked that they should call me "Repeat." Thank the TTBJ that didn't stick!

27. When is the last time you played the air guitar? Saturday night at our family reunion. We danced the night away, which very frequently includes a little air guitar.

28. Have you ever peeked in the opposite sexes locker room? Peeked? (Dad, close your eyes.)

I do believe I just walked right in. Oops.

(Ok, Dad, you can open them now.)

29. What's the weirdest thing you have done while driving?  Again, when I worked for the Home Builders, I used to attend "jumpin' gym" in the city where I now work; and in order to get to my appointment in time to get a full hour in before they closed, I didn't have a lot of time to change my clothes. So...I would get dressed while driving. It was a very intricate process that included some serious strategy.

30. Have you ever bitten your toenails? Umm, no. That is disgusting!

31. How do you eat your cookie? I really try to stay away from cookies. You know, gluten intolerance and all. And like Diddy says, "that's not good for you. Turns you into a raving bitch." It's a good thing I'm a salty/savory kind of girl. 

32. When working out at the gym, do you wear a belt? Only when I wear this outfit:

And when my suspenders are dirty. Obvi.

33. Name something you do when you're alone that you wouldn't do in front of others. Wear the outfit in the picture above.

36. How many drinks does it take before you get drunk? I'm not exactly sure, but it always seems like it is just one from "I'm fine" to "WOO! Blowin' it all out!"

37. Have you ever sniffed an animal's butt? No, but I have artificially inseminated a mare so I've had my hand up one.

38. How often do you clean out your ears? Every other day or so.

39. Do you scrunch or fold your toilet paper? Scrunch.

40. About how many times a day do you pick a wedgie?  Very few.

41. Do you have any strange phobias? I don't think so.

42. Have you ever stuck a foreign object up your nose? No. But once when I was really little, Sissy and I were defying our parents and refusing to go to sleep once we were put to bed and somehow I swallowed a penny. And I FREAKED out! I'm not kidding you - I was hysterical. And I remember Papa carrying me into the kitchen and getting me a drink of water and reassuring me that the penny would not kill me. That was probably traumatizing enough to keep things out of my nose.

43. What is the stupidest thing you've ever done at a bar? A shot.
44. Have you ever been dared to do something you totally regretted?  I'm not certain, but I typically was a "truth" picker.

45. Have you ever called your love interest by an ex's name? No.

46. Have you caught a guy/girl farting while on a date? Can't say that I have.

47. Have you ever played naked Twister? Definitely not.  

48. Have you ever been drunk at work? Not intentionally, but there were probably a few times during my internship in Denver when I hadn't fully recovered from the night before.

49. Have you ever found your date's/lover's brother or sister more attractive? Nope.

50. Do you want to bring sexy back? I'm sorry - do you know me? Done and done!

1 comment:

  1. OMG, you read those dirty Christian Gray books.