Running My Life So It Doesn't Run Me

I'm a control freak.

I will never deny that.

It is one of the reasons that I am risk-adverse. I like controlling the end. It is comfortable.

For me, there is nothing more comforting than a detailed schedule.

(Okay, maybe some things are more comforting…)

I love to know how much time I have to do what I have to do and where I have to be when that is over. 

I run my life.

Earlier this year, I actually thought about calendaring my life down to the half hour.

That's crazy, people.

But I thought about it.

I like structure.

I run my life.

But even when I act like I'm in complete control, it is a ruse.

The truth is, if I were in complete control, I would say 'no' to the things that I don't have time for.

I would find time to do the things that are on my "someday" list.

I would cancel my cable and blog and read and keep an immaculate house.

I would run more. And eat better.

I would spend less. And budget perfectly.

I'm far from perfect, but I am trying.