Today, in honor of Miscellany Monday, which I haven't participated in in some time, a random list, in no particular order, of things that I should remind myself of from time to time. This list is by no means comprehensive.
1. Never apologize for being you. Your likes, dislikes, hobbies, and personality are yours alone. Some people will like them. Others will hate them. It is not your job to make the second group of people join the first. Enjoy being the person you are, doing the things that make you happy.
2. It's ok to cry. Sometimes a good cry is all you need. Just do it. But once you're done, wipe the tears and move on. There are very few things and even fewer people who are worth your time after they've made you cry.
3. Being alone isn't the worst thing in the world. Don't get all crazy and never spend time with other people, but really enjoy the time you spend with yourself. Use it for reflection, writing, reading, cooking, whatever strikes your fancy at the time. There are going to be times in life when all you want is to be alone and you may not get that chance. Cherish the time when you have it.
4. Never settle. In anything. Never settle in love. Never settle for less than you deserve. Never settle for less than your best. Nothing is small enough to warrant settling. Keep pushing. Keep trying. Keep looking. It's out there. Reach for it.
5. Know when to say no. People will ask you to do things. People will ask you to say things. People will ask you to give things. It is ok to say no to the things you aren't willing and able to do/say/give. Don't torture yourself for others.
6. Know when to say yes. On the other hand, there are times when a situation will present itself to you and for whatever reason - fear, ability, sleep - you will want to say no - say yes. Some great things come from saying yes!
7. Surround yourself with people who make you want to be better. It is easy to spend your time with the people who are ok with your status quo. Or even who want to make you be less than you are. Stay away from those people. Find the people who make you come alive. Who challenge you to reach for your goals. Who hold your hand and say, "I'll walk out on the limb with you." They are precious and you will never regret a day spent with them.
8. Love yourself. Love every part of who you are. Embrace who you were, who you are, and who you will be. Cherish the bumps along the road that got you here. Know that you are constantly a work in progress, but also know that you are good enough just how you are.
9. Give yourself compliments. When you look in the mirror and think, "Damn, girl, you look good." Say it out loud! You put in the hard work, you should recognize it. Don't dwell on it and act better than others, but know that it is ok to think that you are beautiful and say it.
10. Tell others how you feel. If you love them - tell them. If what they do for you is great - tell them. If you think they smell good - tell them. It won't always be the easiest conversation, and the reaction may not always be what you want it to be, but you will feel better for having said it.
11. Laugh hysterically. Always. Laughter is the best medicine. Laugh at yourself. Laugh with your friends. Laugh with your family. Always, always laugh.
12. Pray. When things go right, pray. When you struggle, pray. When those around you need it, pray. You always feel better when you pray. Do it!
13. Respect your body, but have the dessert. You've learned a lot about your body over the course of 32 years. Some of it is hard to deal with. Respect what it tells you is good for it and avoid what it tells you is bad for it. But remember that life is short and sometimes it is ok to have the dessert.
14. Expectations are what kill us. If you have expectations of people that they are unaware of, they can rarely live up to them and you will certainly be disappointed.
15. Don't compare yourself to others. Everyone's circumstances are different, you can not compare yourself to another person fairly.
16. Don't judge a book by its cover or a person by their clothes. You miss a lot of great stories by only focusing on outward appearance. Stop it. Stop it right now.
14. Expectations are what kill us. If you have expectations of people that they are unaware of, they can rarely live up to them and you will certainly be disappointed.
15. Don't compare yourself to others. Everyone's circumstances are different, you can not compare yourself to another person fairly.
16. Don't judge a book by its cover or a person by their clothes. You miss a lot of great stories by only focusing on outward appearance. Stop it. Stop it right now.
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